Statuses for Facebook

Morning Routine: 1. Wake Up 2. Check phone for messages 3. Check Facebook for any notifications

insert coin 2 view todayz status!! :D :D

Facebook; the only place where I can be married to my best friend, and have more than 20 siblings.

When someone likes your status that you shared about a week ago and you think to yourself, "They must stalk me."

I think Facebook needs a "NOBODY CARES" button right below the status update.

If you fail, blame it on Facebook

All people on Facebook care about is craving attention

Fridge full of food - Nothing to eat. Wardrobe full of clothes - Nothing to wear. Internet full of sites - only on Facebook/Twitter.

If Facebook ever shut down you`ll see people roaming the streets shoving pictures in peoples faces screaming "Do you like this?! DO YOU?!"

That one annoying relative who comments on everything you do on facebook.

Like this if you think you can do better

How did we spend all our time before Facebook was invented? D:

When I see an argument on Facebook I sit there refreshing the page saying "Oh this is going to be good"

You look stupid using hash tags on Facebook. Hash tags are for Twitter. #Thankyou.

Log Out is the hardest button to press